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Forever Families

Strengthening Marriage Through Marriage Enrichment Programs

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Latter-Day Saints Perspective

The Family: A Proclamation to the World states that marriage partners have "a solemn obligation to love and care for each other" (¶ 6). This love and care requires intentional effort. One way to make this effort is through marriage enrichment programs.

Many religious organizations, public institutions, and private groups have developed enrichment programs. The best ones teach couples the skills they need to make their marriages strong, satisfying, and enduring.

Underwhelming Participation

Unfortunately, very few couples take advantage of marriage enrichment programs. Most wait until their problems are severe before they seek help, and often it's too late for education. Major surgery is required.

Scholars have found three common - and erroneous - reasons that people are reluctant to participate in marriage enrichment programs:

  • Good marriages happen naturally. Many people think a happy, successful marriage should come naturally. They think what they learned about marriage from watching their parents and other couples should be enough. If marriage partners need help to build a successful relationship, the thinking goes, then they must be abnormal or deficient in some way. But this "it's natural" theory is a myth. Few people get enough information about how to create a strong and enduring marriage through absorption alone. Most need additional information and education to build a truly satisfying marriage.
  • Marriage is a private matter. Some people believe the marriage relationship is too private to share with others. They feel it isn't proper to share their marital issues with anyone outside the marriage or to participate in an educational setting where others might see that they need help. Couples with this attitude deprive themselves of the many resources available to improve marital happiness, including the experiences of fellow participants in marriage enrichment programs.
  • Marriage enrichment doesn't help. Some couples believe that marriage enrichment programs are "feel good" experiences that might help briefly but don't help in the long run. In fact, research shows the best marriage enrichment programs help couples improve their marriages in a deep and lasting way.

Which Marriage Enrichment Programs Work?

Self-help is one of the first places many couples turn to for enriching their marriages. Many good books are available, including The Seven Habits for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman, Fighting for Your Marriage by Howard Markman, Scott Stanley, and Susan Blumberg, and Strengthening Couples, by David and Amy Olson.

Those who advocate self-help alone, however, should know that research tells us many marriage enrichment programs show benefits greater than self-help approaches. The most effective programs tend to be highly structured, meaning they focus on teaching specific skills, including communication, problem solving, adaptability, and conflict resolution. They also teach the importance of commitment, love, forgiveness, and friendship.

Some of the better-known and scientifically evaluated programs are listed below. Look for these in your community. If they are not available, see if you can bring them to your community. Each program has its own approach and methods. Learn about the programs, then decide which one best suits you.

For a comprehensive list of marriage enrichment centers and programs, check out the Smart Marriages website at http://www.smartmarriages.com/index.html.

A.C.M.E.

The Association for Couples in Marriage Enrichment (A.C.M.E.) was founded by David Mace in 1973. Its approach is to help couples become more aware of their individual and partner needs. It also teaches problem-solving skills and communication skills. Both weekend retreat and ongoing weekly meeting programs are available. Workshops are held in group settings, which Mace believes enhances the learning of all couples. A.C.M.E. goals include helping couples learn to work as a team, communicate in warm and caring ways, and openly share marital experiences.

Research on A.C.M.E. is not extensive, but what has been done shows that A.C.M.E. improves couple communication and agreement, intimacy and trust, conflict resolution, and a sense of equal partnership.

For more information about A.C.M.E., call 1-800-634-8325; website:http://www.bettermarriages.org .

Couple Communication

In the late 1960s at the University of Minnesota Family Study Center, a group of graduate students developed a program to help couples make the transition between engagement and early marriage. This was the beginning of what became the Couple Communication marriage enrichment program.

This program has three main objectives: (1) communicate more effectively about day-to-day issues, (2) manage and resolve conflicts, and (3) build a more viable and satisfying relationship. It teaches eleven skills for accomplishing these main objectives. The programs are offered in both private and group settings.

Research shows that this program increases a couple's relationship satisfaction and improves communication and problem-solving skills. It has been shown effective for couples of all ages and socioeconomic groups.

For more information about Couple Communication, call 1-800-328-5099;http://www.couplecommunication.com

Prevention and Relationship Enhancement Program (PREP)

PREP helps couples learn better communication and conflict management strategies, understand one another's expections, and build commitment, fun, and friendship into their relationship.

One of the main communication skills PREP teaches is the "Speaker-Listener Technique," where one partner holds the floor and the other is the designated listener. Couples take turns restating each other's feelings, following the Speaker-Listener Technique rules, which include: (1) mind reading is not allowed, and (2) the listener can only restate what he or she hears, and (3) the listener cannot rebut.

Research has shown PREP to be effective in preventing marital discord and helping couples have more satisfying relationships. Long-term studies show that PREP couples have lower rates of divorce, higher marriage satisfaction, and less problem intensity than couples who didn't participate.

To learn more about the PREP marriage enrichment program, write to the Center for Marital and Family Studies, Psychology Department, University of Denver, Denver, CO 80308; website: http://www.prepinc.com.

Other Programs

Many religious organization sponsor marriage classes or seminars. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints provides a 16-week course titled "Marriage and Family Relations." Other faith groups appoint mentor couples to work with newly married couples to help them make the sometimes difficult adjustments during the first year of marriage.

Promoting Marriage Enrichment in the Community

The Proclamation calls on citizens to promote government and community efforts that strengthen marriages and families (¶ 9). Here are some ideas about how to do this from Diane Sollee of the Coalition for Marriage, Families, and Couples Education:

  • Support establishment of a marriage and family coalition, initiative, or commission to coordinate faith-based and secular efforts to strengthen marriages and families. For example, the State of Utah has a Commission on Marriage that sponsors marriage seminars and promotes marriage education.
  • Encourage, support, and promote private, non-profit, and faith-based efforts, such as community marriage policies and community marriage covenants.
  • Support marriage education programs in high schools, youth groups, county courts, extension offices, county mental health agencies, hospitals, military installations, child-birth centers, etc. Make marriage education skills programs widely accessible in county and community service agencies for couples of all races and classes and at all stages of relationship on a subsidized, voucher and/or sliding-scale fee system. A variety of research-based, highly cost-effective curricula already exist that can be implemented in high schools and other programs, such as those for couples making the transition to parenthood.

Written by Bradley Owens, Research Assistant, and edited by Stephen F. Duncan, Professor, School of Family Life, Brigham Young University.

References

  1. Dyer, G. H. (1985). The effects of marriage enrichment on neomarital relationships. Unpublished master's thesis, Texas Woman's University, Denton.
  2. Dyer, P. M., Dyer, G. H. (1999). Marriage enrichment, A.C.M.E.-style. In R. Berger & M. T. Hannah (Eds.), Preventive approaches in couples therapy (pp. 28-54). Lillington, NC: Edwards Brothers.
  3. Giblin, P., Sprenkle, D. H., & Sheehan, R. (1985). Enrichment outcome research: A meta-analysis of premarital, marital and family interventions. Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 11, 257-271.
  4. Guerney, B., Maxson, P. (1990). Marital and family enrichment research: A decade review and look ahead. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 52, 1127-1134.
  5. Miller, S., Sherrard, P. A. D. (1999). Couple communication: A system for equipping partners to talk, listen, and resolve conflicts effectively. In R. Berger & M. T. Hannah (Eds.), Preventive approaches in couples therapy (pp .125-148). Lillington, NC: Edwards Brothers.
  6. Stanley, S. M., Blumberg, S. L., Markman, H. J. (1999). Helping couples fight for their marriages: The PREP approach. In R. Berger & M. T. Hannah (Eds.), Preventive approaches in couples therapy (pp. 279-303). Lillington, NC: Edwards Brothers.
  7. Vincent, C. E. (1973). Sexual and marital health. New York: McGraw-Hill Book Company.

The prevalence of divorce, infidelity, and marital distress confirm the sad fact that the institution of marriage is not well. All married couples would be wise to educate themselves about the common problems that plague marriages today and learn strategies for safeguarding their marriage against them. Marriage enrichment programs have been created for this purpose.

A prominent scholar defines marriage enrichment as "programs designed to strengthen couples . . . so as to promote a high level of present and future family harmony and strength, and hence the long-term psychological, emotional, and social well being of family members".11

Common Concerns About Marriage Enrichment Programs

Misconceptions about marriage enrichment keep too many people from taking advantage of this valuable resource. Misconceptions include "naturalism," "privatism," and a belief that enrichment programs don't work.

Naturalism

Many people believe that a high-quality, satisfying marital relationship should come naturally to normal adults. They believe the training a person receives while growing up should be enough to create a successful marriage. If a couple needs help or is having difficulties, the partners must be deficient. This belief is a myth.

Researchers Dyer and Dyer argue that simply growing up in a family does not necessarily prepare a couple to succeed. It also does not prepare an individual with the "skills necessary to maintain a relationship-oriented marriage".5

Dr. Clark E. Vincent writes that the attitude of naturalism is widespread: "Even in the most advanced technological societies of today, educated people continue to cherish, implicitly if not explicitly, this preindustrial myth that a successful marriage 'just naturally happens', unless the participants are stubborn, evil, or pathologically ill".30

But, says, Vincent, this naturalism attitude harms marriages because it keeps couples from finding ways to make their marriage strong and satisfying:

The myth of naturalism obscures the fact that marriage is the most complex relationship any two people will ever enter into-a relationship for which they usually receive less preparation than for driving a car and to which they give less creative thought annually than they give to their job weekly. Most couples are accustomed to receiving a dental checkup every six months, obtaining a physical examination at least once a year, and taking their car in to be serviced every 1,000 or 2,000 miles. But they would probably consider it irrelevant if the physician were to ask them, "When did you have your last marital checkup?"30

Privatism

Others believe the marriage relationship is so personal that no one should share information about it with non-family members. The Dyers argue that while privatism may be healthy when it comes to the family as a whole, it is harmful to couples because "it [is] like shutting the couple in a box and leaving them with little preparation and even less help for figuring out how to relate to each other in mutually satisfying ways".5 Couples who insist on complete privacy cut themselves off from the many resources available to improve marital happiness. Privatism, like naturalism, is a major deterrent to marriage enrichment.

Effectiveness of Marriage Enrichment Programs

Some couples are skeptical that enrichment programs will really help their relationship. They may feel that what's taught in seminars or workshops can't realistically translate into day-to-day life. Some believe marriage enrichment programs are short-term "feel good" experiences that have no lasting benefit.

Though some programs might be inferior, scientific studies have shown that many marriage enrichment programs are, in fact, highly effective at making a lasting and positive impression on a marriage relationship. For the most part, the most effective programs focus on teaching skills, including communication methods, creative problem solving, adaptability, and conflict resolution. One study showed that skills-oriented programs have a much higher positive impact and greater long-term effect than programs oriented more toward awareness and personality perception.9 The same study showed that couples participating in structured programs are better off than 67% of those who do not.9

Socrates said that "an unexamined life is not worth living." Likewise, an unexamined marriage, where a couple avoids learning how to enrich their relationship, may never create the fulfillment and happiness each partner hopes for.

What Marriage Enrichment Programs Are Available?

Couples can choose from many marriage enrichment programs, each created by a different organization and each with its own approach, central beliefs, and methods. Some are conducted with one couple at a time and others are held in groups. Couples should research what programs are available in their area and decide which format best suits them.

Below is a discussion of several programs with a broad range of formats. A comprehensive list of marriage enrichment centers and programs can be found at http://www.smartmarriages.com/index.html.

A.C.M.E.

The Association for Couples in Marriage Enrichment (A.C.M.E.) was founded by David Mace in 1973. Mace is considered by many to be "the pioneer of the development of marriage counseling in Great Britain and the United States".5 His work with A.C.M.E. has influenced the development of several other prominent marriage enrichment programs, including Couple Communication, Relationship Enhancement, and the Family Communication Center in conjunction with the YMCA.5

The central beliefs of A.C.M.E. are that "the marital relationship itself [is] the key to successful family life" and that "preventive interventions [are] more efficient and more effective than treatment".5 A.C.M.E. helps couples become more aware of their individual and partner needs and teaches them effective problem solving and communication skills. Couples can choose a weekend retreat or an ongoing weekly program. The goals for couples participating in A.C.M.E. include working as a team, communicating in warm and caring ways, and openly sharing marital experiences.

Research on A.C.M.E. has not been extensive, but what has been done shows A.C.M.E. is effective. Swicegood29 studied 25 couples who participated in A.C.M.E. and found that the program significantly improved couple communication and agreement between husband and wife. Another study showed A.C.M.E. significantly improved intimacy and trust between marriage partners.22 Dyer studied 16 couples who were randomly divided into an A.C.M.E. group and a control group. Results showed that A.C.M.E. helped couples improve in conflict resolution, egalitarian roles, and overall positive change in the relationship.4

For more information about A.C.M.E call 1-800-634-8325. Website:http://www.bettermarriages.org/

Marriage Encounter

"Marriage Encounter: A Positive Preventative Enrichment Program" was created in 1952 by Father Gabriel Calvo, a Catholic priest in Barcelona, Spain. Many distressed couples in his parish sought his counsel, and he decided he could help them better if he were more familiar with the characteristics of happy, harmonious couples. He began observing the happy couples around him, then analyzed the differences between them and unhappy couples. With the information he gathered, he formed the weekend Marriage Encounter retreat.

During the retreat couples are given thirteen presentations called "steps" that revolve around four central themes: (1) self-appraisal and consideration, (2) concerns within the relationship, (3) spirituality, and (4) issues dealings with the couple as part of a community.6 The couple is taught about marriage as a religious relationship between God and each other, the importance of accepting and trusting each other, and that love is transcendent above all other qualities in the marital relationship.

One of Marriage Encounter's unique features is allotting couples personal reflection time throughout the weekend to write down their impressions and feelings about what they're learning. Afterward, couples share with each other their reflections. Reflecting allows couples time to assimilate and absorb the material they are being taught and facilitates discussion between the couples. Another unique feature is a ceremony on the last day of the retreat where each couple can renew their marriage vows.6

A comprehensive study of Marriage Encounter was conducted by the National Institute for the Family (1990). It evaluated couples who attended Marriage Encounter from 1965 to 1989, and the results showed a majority ranked the long-term impact on intimacy and closeness as "very good." Sixty-two percent said the positive long-term impact on communication was "very high." Another researcher concluded: "Marriage Encounter programs have often received affirmations of 80% to 90% in post-weekend surveys and . . . the program demonstrates clear effectiveness when its participants are involved [in] . . . controlled pre/post-weekend research".21

For more information about Marriage Encounter, call 1-800-828-3351.

Couple Communication

In the late 1960s at the University of Minnesota Family Study Center, a group of graduate students, Sherod Miller, Elam Nunnally, and Daniel Wackman, developed a program to help couples successfully make the transition between engagement and early marriage. This was the beginning of the Couple Communication marriage enrichment program.

This program aims to help couples (1) communicate more effectively about day-to-day issues, (2) manage and resolve conflicts, and (3) build a more viable and satisfying relationship.24 It is a "skill learning" based program that teaches eleven specific skills. The program is offered in both private and group settings.

Studies show that couples who participated in Couple Communication feel a higher level of relationship satisfaction and increased competency in communication and problem solving skills.18,23 Research also found that highly distressed couples benefit from the program1 and that the program increased self-esteem and self-disclosure.7 Couple Communication is effective for couples of all ages and socioeconomic groups.24

For more information about Couple Communication, call 1-800-328-5099. Website:http://www.couplecommunication.com

Prepare/Enrich Inventory

In response to a challenge in the late 1970s to increase the effectiveness of marriage enrichment programs in the Twin Cities, David Olson began developing what is now the PREPARE/ENRICH inventory. This program provides couples with a questionnaire that helps partners think and talk about important issues. The PREPARE/ENRICH program revolves around four preventative principles, which Olson explains as follows:

First, factors that relate to marital success need to be identified. Second, couples need to be assessed on those critical variables. Third, feedback and exercises need to be given to couples, which will help them deal with problem areas. Fourth, couples need skill-building exercises that focus on communication and conflict resolution skills.26

Couples have the option of seeing a counselor who can help them interpret the results of the inventory, give them guidance, and offer skills training to improve problem areas.

Though the program originally was geared toward helping couples preparing for marriage, David Olson and his daughter Amy have developed inventories tailored for other situations. PREPARE-MC is for couples with children who are planning to marry. ENRICH is for married or cohabiting couples who want to enhance their relationship. MATE is designed for couples aged 50 or older who are planning to marry or already married but planning other major changes, including retirement.26

Some scholars believe one of the reasons so few couples participate in marriage enrichment is that not enough programs determine clients' needs and direct their intervention to meet those needs.27 Olson's approach addresses this issue by helping couples complete a thorough self-evaluation so they know more about themselves and each other before they enter the program. The PREPARE/ENRICH inventory helps couples know exactly where they have conflicting ideas about their relationship. It also helps their counselor/facilitator know specifically what aspects of the relationship they need to work on.

Very strong scientific research backs up the effectiveness of PREPARE/ENRICH. Four separate studies found that the PREPARE/ENRICH questionnaire predicts with 80% to 85% accuracy which couples will have a high degree of satisfaction in their marriages and which couples will have problems.8, 16

For more information about PREPARE/ENRICH call 1-800-331-1661. Website: http://www.lifeinnovation.com

The RELATE Premarital Questionnaire

In 1980, Dr. Wesley Burr developed a questionnaire called Marriage Inventories, which he used in his university marriage preparation class. The inventory focused on the predictors for marital success and failure. As new research emerged, Burr frequently refined the inventory. In 1997 a new and improved version of the program was released called RELATE.

RELATE is unique because it is designed not only for engaged couples but also "for use with individuals or couples who are single and unattached, steady dating, engaged, cohabiting, married, or contemplating remarriage" (see http://www.relate-institute.org).

The RELATE Premarital Questionnaire is the product of twenty years of research. Two of its developers, Dr. Jeff Larson and Dr. Tom Holman, did "an exhaustive review of the social science research literature on premarital characteristics that predict later marital satisfaction. In reviewing clinical and research literature from about 1935 to the present, we found over two dozen specifics that contribute to marital satisfaction".17

They also found "two dozen or so specific premarital predictors [that] could be logically categorized into . . . three major factors".17 The three factors are context, individual traits, and couple traits. The context portion of the questionnaire covers a person's background, external and internal pressures, and past relationship experience. The individual traits section focuses on personality, expectations, attitudes, and skills. The couples traits section covers topics such as couple communication, similarities, pressures to marry (if any), and length of acquaintance.

Tens of thousands of couples and individuals have benefited from these questionnaires for more than 20 years. The RELATE questionnaire can be taken online for $5 per individual and $10 per couple. A results sheet shows which predictors for marital success each person is strong in and which issues a couple should talk about together and work on. Because the inventory is based on the elements that are most important to talk about when building a successful relationship, even couples who have been married for years can benefit from taking RELATE.

Recent research confirms the validity of the premarital prediction factors upon which the program is based and has verified the reliability and effectiveness of the RELATE inventory.14

For more information about RELATE, see http://www.relate-institute.org; phone (801) 422-4359.

The Prevention and Relationship Enhancement Program (PREP)

PREP was founded by Howard Markman, Scott Stanley, and Susan Blumberg. It helps couples "fight for their marriages".28 The program's main focus is communication-learning which communication patterns lead to a stronger marriage and which patterns are destructive. The PREP program also teaches couples effective ways of resolving conflict. A central precept is that how couples fight is much more important that how often they fight or what they fight about. PREP teaches skills that help couples "fight fair" and handle disagreements in a way that both partners are understood and a solution can be found.

The four main goals of PREP are: (1) "teach couples better communication and conflict management strategies," (2) "aid couples in clarifying and evaluating expectations," (3) "boost understanding of and choices reflecting commitment and to enhance the positive bonding that comes from fun, friendship, and sensuality" (Stanley et al., 1999, p. 283).

One of the main skills taught in PREP is the "Speaker-Listener Technique," which Stanley defines as "a structured approach to good communication and conflict management".28 In this technique one partner holds the "floor" and the other is the designated "listener." Couples take turns restating each other's feelings as they are expressed. Rules of the Speaker-Listener Technique include: (1) couples must share the floor, (2) mind reading is not allowed, and (3) the listener can only restate what he or she hears without rebutting.28

Research has shown PREP is effective in helping married couples prevent discord and achieve a more satisfying relationship. In 1993 a study in Germany showed that PREP helped couples significantly increase communication and conflict management skills. In a three-year follow up, the couples were more satisfied with their marriages and more stable than a control group.12 PREP couples averaged a 4% divorce rate as compared to a 24% rate for those in the control group.12

Another study concluded: "PREP couples have been shown to have about half the likelihood of breaking up or divorcing, have demonstrated greater relationship satisfaction, and have shown lower problem intensity than the control couples for up to five years following training".19

To learn more about PREP, write to the Center for Marital and Family Studies, Psychology Department, University of Denver, Denver, CO 80308. Website: http://www.prepinc.com.

Relationship Enhancement

Relationship Enhancement was created by Bernard Guerney. Its development stems back to the early 1950s, when Guerney suggested training parents in the skills necessary to conduct "Child-Centered Play Therapy".2 As he observed the effectiveness of teaching parents to act in a therapist role, he had the idea of teaching couples how to be therapists to each other. The program is based on the idea that "teach[ing] the skills to couples and families before they get into trouble" is much more effective than trying to help when relationships are already broken or frail.2

A unique feature of Relationship Enhancement is its focus on "enhancing the positive aspects of relationships, rather than removing or preventing marital pathology".10 The program teaches the elements that make couple and family relationships satisfying rather than equipping the couple or family with defenses in case things fall apart.

The program is based on the theory that people can influence the responses of others. The objective is to help couples act in a way that elicits relationship-building behavior in their partner. Some of the skills taught include (1) the "expressive skill," which helps partners "better understand their own sources of stress, needs, and desires, and to express them to others in a way least likely to foster defensiveness, anxiety, hostility, and conflict"; (2) the "empathetic skill," which helps couples better understand their partner's needs and respond more effectively; and (3) the "facilitative (coaching) skill," which "enables participants to exit negative-negative communication spirals and . . . help each other to master the RE skills".10,2

Research on Relationship Enhancement has been substantial, and findings show the program is exceptionally good. It is effective for both distressed and non-distressed couples, and it significantly increases "communication, relationship satisfaction, and ability to handle problems" (Jessee & Guerney, 1981). In 1985, a study examined the effectiveness of 85 different marriage enrichment programs. The results showed Relationship Enhancement generally to be superior to other programs.9

For more information about Relationship Enhancement call 1-800-432-6454. Website: http://www.nire.org.

Further Ideas for Enriching Your Marriage

  • Learn about programs by exploring websites such as http://www.smartmarriages.com, which includes a comprehensive list of marriage enrichment programs. Information about each program includes websites and email addresses for those who want to learn more.
  • Go the library or bookstore and read about marriage enrichment. Good books include Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman, Fighting for Your Marriage by Scott Stanley, and Strengthening Couples, by David and Amy Olson.
  • Participate in church-sponsored marriage classes or seminars.
  • Contact local government offices to learn about couple or family classes available in your community.
  • Take an online PREPARE/ENRICH or RELATE couple inventory and discuss the results with your spouse.
  • Ask senior married couples in your community for their wisdom on enriching marriage.
  • Candidly ask your spouse for feedback about how you can enrich your marriage. Listen to the suggestions and apply them.

Written by Bradley Owens, Research Assistant, and edited by Stephen F. Duncan, Professor, School of Family Life, Brigham Young University.

References

  1. Aldridge, R. G., & Aldridge, C. H. (1983). Couple communication: An analysis of two divergent student groups. Corrective and Social psychiatry and Journal of Behavior Technology, Methods, and Therapy, 29, 36-38.
  2. Calvedo, C., & Guerney, B. G. (1999). Relationship enhancement enrichment and problem-prevention programs: Therapy-derived, powerful, versatile. In R. Berger & M. T. Hannah (Eds.), Preventive approaches in couples therapy (pp. 73-105). Lillington, NC: Edwards Brothers.
  3. Carlson, J., Dinkmeyer, D. (1999). Time for a better marriage. In R. Berger & M. T. Hannah (Eds.), Preventive approaches in couples' therapy (149-168). Lillington, NC: Edwards Brothers.
  4. Dyer, G. H. (1985). The effects of marriage enrichment on neomarital relationships. Unpublished master's thesis, Texas Woman's University, Denton.
  5. Dyer, P. M., Dyer, G. H. (1999). Marriage enrichment, A.C.M.E.-style. In R. Berger & M. T. Hannah (Eds.), Preventive approaches in couples therapy (28-54). Lillington, NC: Edwards Brothers.
  6. Elin, R. J. (1999). Marriage encounter: A positive preventive enrichment program. In R. Berger & M.T. Hannah (Eds.), Preventive approaches in couples therapy (pp. 55-72). Lillington, NC: Edwards Brothers.
  7. Fleming, M. J. (1977). An evaluation of a structured program designed to teach communication skills and concepts to couples: A field study. Dissertation Abstracts International, 37, 7633A-7634A. (UMI. 77-13, 315).
  8. Fowers, B. J., & Olson, D. H. (1986). Predicting marital success with PREPARE: A predictive validity study. Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 12, 403-413.
  9. Giblin, P., Sprenkle, D. H., & Sheehan, R. (1985). Enrichment outcome research: A meta-analysis of premarital, marital and family interventions. Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 11(3), 257-271.
  10. Guerney, B. G., Jr., Brock, G., & Coufal, J. (1986). Integrating marital therapy and enrichment: The Relationship Enhancement approach. In N. Jacobson & A. Gurman (Eds.), Clinical Handbook of Marital Therapy. New York: Guilford Press, 151-172.
  11. Guerney, B., Maxson, P. (1990). Marital and family enrichment research: A decade review and look ahead. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 52, 1127-1134.
  12. Hahlweg, K., Markman, H. J., Thurmaier, F., Engl, J., & Eckert, V. (1998). Prevention of marital distress: Results of a German prospective-longitudinal study. Manuscript submitted for publication.
  13. Hawley, D. R., Olson, D. H. (1995). Enriching newlyweds: An evaluation of three enrichment programs. The American Journal of Family Therapy, 23(2), 129-147.
  14. Holman, T. B., Busby, D. M., Doxey, C., Klein, D. M., & Loyer-Carlson, V. (1997). The RELATionship Evaluation. Provo, UT: Center for Family Studies.
  15. Jessee, R., & Guerney, B. G., Jr. (1981). A comparison of Gestalt and Relationship Enhancement treatments with married couples. American Journal of Family Therapy, 9, 31-41.
  16. Larsen, A. S., & Olson, D. H. (1989). Predicting marital satisfaction using PREPARE: A replication study. Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 15, 311-322.
  17. Larson, J. H. (2000). Should we stay together? San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, Inc.
  18. Larson, J. H., & Holman, T. B. (1994). Premarital predictors of marital quality and stability. Family Relations, 43, 228-237.
  19. Markman, J. J., Floyd, F. J., Stanley, S. M., & Storaasli, R. D. (1988). Prevention of marital distress: A longitudinal investigation. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 56, 210-217.
  20. Mattson, D., Christensen, O., & England, J. (1990). The effectiveness of a specific marital enrichment program: TIME. Individual Psychology, 46, 88-92.
  21. McManus, M. J. (1993). Marriage savers. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan.
  22. Michael. P. (1983). The effect of growth in marriage for newlyweds on newlywed couples' perception of trust, intimacy, and overall quality of the relationship. Unpublished master's thesis, University of Missouri-Kansas City.
  23. Miller, S. L. (1971). The effects of communication training in small groups upon self-disclosure and openness in engaged couples' systems of interaction: A field experiment. Dissertation Abstracts International, 32, 2819A-2820A. (UMI 71-28,263).
  24. Miller, S., Sherrard, P. A. D. (1999). Couple communication: A system for equipping partners to talk, listen, and resolve conflicts effectively. In R. Berger & M. T. Hannah (Eds.), Preventive approaches in couples therapy (pp. 125-148). Lillington, NC: Edwards Brothers.
  25. National Institute for the Family. (1990). Worldwide marriage encounter: National survey and assessment. Washington, DC: Author.
  26. Olson, D. H., Olson, A. K. (1999). PREPARE/ENRICH program: Version 2000. In R. Berger & M. T. Hannah (Eds.), Preventive approaches in couples therapy (pp. 196-216). Lillington, NC: Edwards Brothers.
  27. Schumm, W. R., & Denton, W. (1979). Trends in premarital counseling. Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 5, 23-32.
  28. Stanley, S. M., Blumberg, S. L., Markman, H. J. (1999). Helping couples fight for their marriages: The PREP approach. In R. Berger & M. T. Hannah (Eds.), Preventive approaches in couples therapy (pp. 279-303). Lillington, NC: Edwards Brothers.
  29. Swicegood, M. L. (1974). An evaluative study of one approach to marriage enrichment. Unpublished doctoral dissertation, University of North Carolina-Greensboro.
  30. Vincent, C. E. (1973). Sexual and marital health. New York: McGraw-Hill Book Company.

Marriage is a sacred and essential part of God's efforts to exalt His sons and daughters. The Family: A Proclamation to the World (paragraph 6) states that marriage "is ordained of God" (¶ 1). President Gordon B. Hinckley taught, "Surely no one reading the scriptures, both ancient and modern, can doubt the divine concept of marriage".3

A casual attitude toward the marriage relationship seems to be growing. Many believe a marriage can't be expected to last and should be terminated when it stops being fulfilling to one or both partners. But Heavenly Father has made it clear that he expects marriage partners to treat their vows with the utmost seriousness. He intends the marriage relationship to be the most fulfilling of all earthly relationships. As President Hinckley taught, "The sweetest feelings of life, the most generous and satisfying impulses of the human heart, find expression in a marriage that stands pure and unsullied above the evil of the world".3

For a marriage to yield such a high degree of satisfaction, both husband and wife must be deeply committed and willing to make the efforts needed to build the relationship.

Marriage Enrichment Programs

Elder James E. Faust said too many marriages lack "a constant enrichment." They don't have "that something extra, which makes it precious, special, and wonderful".2 Knowing how to enrich a marriage, to add what's needed to make it "precious, special, and wonderful" doesn't come naturally. Couples need information, education, and the experience of others to learn what works in a marital relationship and what doesn't, what strengthens the marital bond, and what weakens it.

LDS couples stand to benefit greatly from participation in marriage enrichment programs. However, few couples take the opportunity. Why is this so? Some may believe that LDS couples don't need such a program-all they need to do is live the gospel the best they can. However, two recent national studies showed no differences in the rate of divorce between LDS and non-LDS couples. Even temple married couples are at greater risk today than in times past. Other persons may believe the myth that the Brethren don't endorse such programs.

Many good marriage programs have been developed, including a 16-week "Marriage and Family Relations" program developed by the Church. Latter-day Saint couples can benefit from this program or the many others that research has shown to be effective. Brigham Young1 taught that the gospel embraces all truth, and we should "gather up all the truths in the world pertaining to life and salvation, to the Gospel we preach. . . to the sciences, and to philosophy, wherever it may be found . . . and bring it to Zion".2

References

  1. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (1997). Teachings of the presidents of the Church: Brigham Young. Salt Lake City, UT: Author.
  2. Faust, J. E. (1977, November). The enriching of marriage. Ensign 10-11.
  3. Hinckley, G. B. (1991, May). What God hath joined together. Ensign 71-74.